This morning I woke up to a woodpecker hammering away (that’s what she said) on my bedroom window. It was seriously ticked off at my cat who was just minding its own business staring outside. It was shocking to me that it understood the concept of glass and knew that Baby Kitty couldn’t reach it. I even opened the curtain and it didn’t fly away, in fact, it looked me straight in the eye and pecked one last time before flying over the to the nearest power line. There’s some drama in the bird world this morning.
Sometimes things don’t go the way you’d like them to. It happens to everyone, more often than we’d probably like. When it’s happening to you, it’s hard to see the bigger picture – how it fits into the grand scheme of things. Two things happen whenever you experience something significant: First, your feelings get center stage. Feelings are rarely rational things. That’s why they can be wonderful and why sometimes they can be terrrrrible. Second, hopefully sooner rather than later, your brain kicks in and tries to put everything into perspective. The feelings may still be there, but they no longer control your outlook. Things are rarely as bad as they first seem.
Yesterday I had a “feelings” day. Actually, my feelings probably dominated the last few weeks. Not always in a bad way… and honestly it was good for me to be a little vulnerable. This morning I woke up with a greater sense of understanding and peace. I don’t always talk about what is specifically going on my life, and I know I am skipping around it here, but the point today is the process and what we learn from it.
So with all of this mental activity going on around me, I find myself with nothing to do. All week I planned to keep Saturday and Sunday open, and that’s exactly what’s happened. Yesterday it felt awkward and uncomfortable, and I actively looked for things to fill my time. Today I feel less restless. I think I will be content to just read in the park today on a blanket in a snuggly sweater. And maybe take an extra long nap this afternoon. Write a little in my purple notebook. Have eggs for breakfast. This is the day I’ve been looking for…