Today I’ve been given a word assignment: Trust
It’s actually pretty tough to base a post around a word. I don’t think I have any negative associations with the word trust, as I usually have a fairly good sense of who around me is worthy of it. I take that back… you know, about a month ago someone did betray my trust, and I don’t even know if they realize it. It made me very angry with them, and I was taken back by the danger they could have placed me in with the private information they shared. I never confronted that individual about it though, instead I just made a permanent mental note.
To trust is an optimistic action, because along with it comes the risk of losing a belief. It shows that you believe in something or somebody as true until otherwise proven wrong. In that sense, trust and belief are very similar ideas…and maybe even faith. Some of my greatest vulnerabilities and sensitivities were caused by someone I trusted hurting me. A betrayal of trust is nothing short of cruel, like someone smiling while they slap you in the face. When I was young, if someone I trusted told me something about myself – whether good or bad – I believed it. I gave the wrong people and ideas too much power for a long time. It was a hard habit to break…and I don’t think that I learned to trust myself over others until I was in my mid to late twenties. I think that is a huge part of my ambition and drive to do big things, because accomplishing them confirms that I can in fact believe in myself. I can trust that I will finish something that I start. I can trust that I will always try to be the best person I can be. Still some of that is fear driven, but I think I genuinely love the things that I pursue. I’ve started to let go of the notion that I have something to prove to anyone else, that the only things worth doing are the things that bring me joy. It’s also where forgiving myself, as I spoke about yesterday, becomes a very important thing.
When I think about the people who I love the most, it’s because I trust them a great deal. They are genuine. We’ve shown each other an equal amount of respect, transparency and care. Not everyone is worthy of that, so when you find those special souls you keep them forever.
I trust that the future can be anything I want it to be. That most things happen to us for a purpose and our ultimate benefit. I trust that we probably know more than we ever believe that we do. And I trust that I am living the best life that I can with what I’ve been given.
If you would like to suggest a word or a thought for me to do a post on, please send it my way either in person, comment or private message. Thanks for giving me the idea, Jeff. And thanks for the word James!